Guys who describe themselves as the nice guy are always saying things like, “Why do nice guys finish last?” The answer is – they don’t… Weak guys finish last. Very often behaviors that you call nice are perceived by women as weak. And they are usually right.
So Mr. Nice Guy, get ready for a rude awakening – You are really Mr. Weak Guy. The gauge you are using to qualify your “niceness” is way off. You need to think in terms of being a GOOD guy, not a NICE guy. Women really don’t want jerks. They want many of the qualities that a jerk portrays but they don’t want you to really be a mean jerk.
Take a look at the classic hero in most action movies. Let’s look at Indiana Jones for a minute. You’ll notice that for the most part he isn’t a nice guy. He has no time for silly games, he tends to be rather abrupt with people who can’t keep up with him, and he doesn’t kiss anyone’s ass. To the amateur eye he may even come across as a jerk. But, here’s what makes him the hero. When it comes down to it he really is a good guy. He really wants to help people. He has a big heart and even sacrifices his own life to help others around him. This is what women want. It’s okay to have a big heart and to be a really good guy. In fact, women LOVE that. It’s one of the main qualities they look for in a man.
You need to learn to separate the concept of what you’ve been calling the “nice guy” from the “good guy.” The nice guy tells everyone what they want to hear. The nice guy doesn’t stand his ground or voice his opinion when people offer adversity. The good guy isn’t concerned with catering to everyone around him and isn’t interested in telling people what they want to hear. He is however very caring and really wants to help people when it comes to serious issues. The good guy is the one who sacrifices himself when it really counts. He has a genuine love for people. You can and should be a good guy without being a weak “nice guy”.