Hmmm, the dictionary says – not committed to a particular course or policy. So what does that mean in a relationship?
I asked around and I received interesting comments: unreliable, unfettered, not tied down, not willing to take the sacred walk.
So, I guess the question is, now, why would you want to be in a relationship like this? Is it a bad thing? That would depend on where you’re coming from. Have you had difficult relationships and your heart is fearful? Have you just left a relationship and committing to someone new doesn’t appeal? Is this an excuse so you can play the field? There are tons of reasons people don’t commit.
Do you know someone who isn’t in any hurry? Are you seeing them? Are you ready and they aren’t? That is the big dilemma. How do you convince your “other” you want to be “significant”? And do you really want to?
I know I’m asking so many questions and not giving any answers. I can see both sides and it makes this topic difficult. I can see why not committing is appealing, especially if you are very busy with work. Sometimes being committed to someone makes you feel like you need to spread yourself too thin. Also, if you are dating other folks too, maybe you haven’t really been drawn to that particular someone. Should you be committed to someone if you don’t feel that strongly? Maybe dating around will help you figure out what you’re looking for and who has those attributes.
I know being committed has its pluses: you’re monogamous, you know who you’re spending your time with, you have a special “someone”. We all want to know there is someone out there who cares what’s going on with us, will come to our aide when needed and makes us feel loved. Commitment can be good.
Okay, so you’re ready to commit, looking for that special someone, and you think you’ve found them. What if they don’t want to commit, they aren’t ready. Do you wait for them or let them go? Does it bother you they see someone else besides you? If so, I would say move on. If you can handle it and you really like them, stick it out awhile. They might be the one.
Are you in an uncommitted relationship just because you don’t say you’re in love? Is it love that makes us committed? It’s very difficult to find someone you are mentally and physically attracted to, someone who stimulates all of our senses.
I’m full of questions today. Anyone have any answers? I’d love to hear your thoughts.